YOU ARE THE BLOSSOMING BUD

And then the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud, was more painful than the risk to bloom.
-Anais Nin

We all face this turning point repeatedly:  when resisting the flow of inner events suddenly feels more hurtful than leaping toward the unknown.  Yet no one can tell us when to leap.  There is no authority to bless our need to enter life but God within.

​-Mark Nepo

The above quotes, from The Book of Awakening: Having the Life You Want by Being Present to the Life You Have, speaks to the many ways and times throughout our life time, when we have resisted the inner stirrings that lie within.  It could be saying “Go North”, but that might take us too far from the comforts of famiiar people in our lives, it could say SouthWest, but then our employment and financial security is in the North East.  It could even just say take 10 steps in that direction, just taste, dip a toe, but we may fear that we will like it more than the familiar life we have.

We all have enormous worlds within.  Just lay down for 10 minutes in the course of your day and notice where your mind goes.  Do something that is centering, that brings you back to you, and feel the feelings - perhaps the aches and pains that need tending to, the rumbling in your stomach asking you to nourish it…..the tightness in your shoulders asking to go for that swim that always seems to stretch out the kinks.


I know that life has at times, asked me to be outwardly focused, and then, softened or slowed down just enough to direct me inwardly.  During these times, I tend to have paper and pen with me everywhere I am, or use my Notes App on my phone to document things like complaints, joys, inspiration, wisdom, humorous moments parts of my body needing attention…….whatever shows up, so that I can be present to the inner rumblings.  I will share them with people in my life, and they will give me feedback or simply express what shows up for them in the context of sharing.


In this way, I make alive what would otherwise be silent, missed, unnoticed, hidden behind the curtains of what is visible to others..and myself.   I learn the art of honoring and respecting the “spirit”, the “soul” that lives deeply within, that can easily be ignored, misunderstood and forgotten, should I only give my attention to the tasks, responsibilities, and commitments that, to no end, call me outward.

I also become much more in tune with and clear about who I am……for myself, others and the world at large.  I hone the skill and develop the practice of valuing myself and my life.  In sharing my inner stirrings with admired and respected friends, there are themes of feedback over a lifetime that confirm who I already know myself to be (and noteworthy, as a young woman who I wanted to be).  I could share them with you here, but this email is more about you, and the life that is yours, a precious unfolding and blooming of who you are in the world.


Mark Nepo asks:

1. Try to identify what scares you most about being who you are in the world.
2. As you meditate, imagine the God in you, warming your fears open.
3. Note what it feels like t have your centre safely exposed, even for a moment.
4. Without telling anyone, imagine this opening of sometime during your day:  at your desk, on the bus, in line at the supermarket
5. Note what it feels like to have your centre safely exposed, even for a moment, in the presence of others.
6. Repeat this meditation whenever you start to feel your sense of things tighten.

The key to this meditation is “safely”…..when you are exposing yourself in this visualization, everything and everyone is safe.  They are kind, generous, understanding, charitable, forgiving and non-judgmental.  They are waiting for you to open up your centre, because they already know that you are good and enough, and want to witness the sparkle that bursts forth.


Like magic to a yummy 5 year old, icing on the already delicious cake, the bernaise sauce to a perfectly cooked steak.


Here is to having a week of self-wonder, self-kindness and magic.